Barbara embarked on her retirement journey with boundless excitement. After a fulfilling career, she eagerly anticipated indulging in all the activities she had longed to pursue but never had the time for. The initial days were filled with exhilaration as the prospect of unrestricted freedom became reality. Embracing the quintessential “retirement dream,” Barbara had envisioned endless days on the golf course: She even contemplated the possibility of turning pro and exploring new horizons.
However, as time unfolded, Barbara encountered an unforeseen hurdle. The allure of daily golfing faded, leaving her bewildered and disheartened. Like many retirees, she found herself grappling with the daunting task of filling her days with meaningful pursuits.
In our professional lives, we often endure a relentless scarcity of time. This makes retirement appear as a sanctuary of unlimited leisure. Yet, the reality often falls short of expectations.
Part of the problem is a nasty trick our minds play on us called “hedonic adaptation.” Abundant access to things we enjoy leads us to grow accustomed to them. Then we savor them less and they lose their positive impact on our happiness.
Overwhelmed or Aimless
After living for decades not having enough time to do things we enjoy, it’s hard to imagine that we could have too much time to do what we want.
Yet a recent study published by the American Psychological Association, by Marissa Sharif and others, highlighted the paradox of having excessive discretionary time, linking it to lower subjective well-being due to a lack of productivity. While the prospect of unfettered days may seem enticing, the absence of structure can lead to feelings of aimlessness and dissatisfaction.
Barbara learned that staring at wide-open days with nothing on your calendar can be overwhelming. On the other hand, being busier than ever but feeling empty at the end of the day isn’t a lot better. After a while, feeling like you haven’t accomplished anything that you consider to be worthwhile becomes debilitating.
Our expectations about this time of our life are high and when life doesn’t measure up to them, it’s common to feel like a failure. To avoid that feeling retirees must figure out what they need to fill their time with to be happy on a daily basis. As an advisor, you can help them.
Time Management in Retirement?
Time management in this chapter of our lives sounds like an oxymoron. We needed to do that in our time-starved lives in order to get everything done. Getting everything done isn’t the problem now. The challenge is getting the right things done. If you don’t mindfully and intentionally plan your days, your life won’t look like what you dreamed it would. Having a rhythm, a cadence to your days and weeks increases your sense of well-being.
Anja Sassenberg-DeGeorgia, an expert in this area, says, “There is a paradox — to really embrace all the freedom in this life stage, the first thing you have to give up is some freedom and create routines.”
With freedom comes responsibility. The key lies in striking a balance between them. It is our responsibility to actively design our days, filling them with activities that cultivate fulfillment and purpose, as well as fun. When we have a routine, we feel more productive because it’s a deliberate plan that helps us focus on activities that we want and need to accomplish. Embracing routines not as constraints but as tools for organizing our time can foster a sense of accomplishment and vitality.
Designing a Routine
Let your retired or soon-to-be retired clients know that designing a personalized routine begins with a thorough audit of how they are currently allocating their time. Most of us do a bad job of estimating where the hours go. Encourage them to create a worksheet that is divided into four parts: morning, afternoon, evening and night. Yes, they should monitor how much they are sleeping because of its importance for their overall well-being.
Encourage your clients to log how they are spending their time for a week. At the end of the week, they should roughly summarize their time into these categories:
- Hours of basics – household tasks, errands, personal care
- Hours of fun and fulfillment
- Hours of sleep
- Empty hours
Tell you clients to think about what they learned. Hopefully, they’ll gain some insight into what is robbing their time.
4-Step Framework
Next, encourage your clients to create a new framework for a typical week. In her book,” On the Edge of Something Bigger: Empowering Steps for Retirees Who Want More Meaning, Fulfillment and Fun,” Sassenberg-DeGeorgia suggests four strategies based on her study of how entrepreneurs manage their time:
1. The 80/20 Rule
What are the 20% of things you do that create 80% of your well-being? These are things that add meaning and purpose to your life. They are also activities that affect every aspect of our health — connection, movement, stress management and sleep. Fun and relaxation are also part of this mix. These are your high-value activities because they have the highest impact on you thriving. Make a list and prioritize them.
2. Morning Power Hour
Take advantage of the energy you have in the morning by creating a routine that sets the tone for the rest of your day.
Also take a few minutes each morning to think about what you want the day to be like. Are you happy with the things that are on your calendar? If not, can you change them? What would you like to add?
For many people also having an evening routine helps them to sleep better.
3. Mindful Time Containers
I have to admit that when I first read this strategy I thought,“This is way too structured for me!” But it is very effective in getting tasks and projects done without letting them expand to fill more time than you want to invest in them.
The idea is to break chores or tasks like reading the news into defined time units during which you stay focused on what you are doing and then take a short break. It is based on the Pomodoro technique, which was designed to manage projects more efficiently. That approach sets 25-minute blocks followed by 5-minute breaks and uses a kitchen timer in the shape of a red tomato – hence, the name. You can set whatever length you want but concentrate on the task and don’t let distractions interrupt you. You’ll be surprised at how much you get done without wasting as much time.
4. Focus Days
Dan Sullivan, founder and president of The Strategic Coach Inc., is a visionary, an innovator and a coach to entrepreneurs. He believes in creating themes for your days because the patterns they create boost our energy, optimism and happiness. For example, you might designate Monday, Tuesday and Thursday for your high-value activities, and Wednesday and Friday for “stuff” like errands, doctor appointments and home maintenance.
You should also create one or two “days off” that feel like the weekend. Weekends rejuvenate us.
For couples
The structure retirees design should also embrace flexibility and spontaneity. It is not intended to be a constraint but a vehicle to help one live their life filled with what they desire.
Couples in a significant relationship should have a weekly meeting to talk about their plans. Paul and Sophie retired about two years before we started working together. They were struggling because they felt like they never got anything done. They blamed it on procrastination but the real culprit was they didn’t have a clear idea about what would make their life feel fulfilling. Further, they were filling their days with random things that came along and did not feel productive.
Additional Reading: How Retirement Can Lead to Divorce
Once we identified their high-value activities, they were able to design a routine that felt good to them. Like all couples, their plan included “me time” as well as “we time” activities – things they did separately and things they did together.
The key to making Paul and Sophie’s plan work is their weekly meeting. Every Sunday morning, they talk about what lays ahead in the new week. This clarified their expectations and improved the likelihood that meaningful activities would actually happen.
In summary, creating structure in retirement is not about constraining our freedom but harnessing it to craft a life filled with purpose and joy. By embracing routines and intentional planning, we cultivate a sense of fulfillment that makes this a great chapter of your life.
Marianne Oehser is the author of Your Happiness Portfolio® for Retirement: It’s Not About the Money, and co-founder of Next Chapter Lifestyle Advisors. Marianne and her partner, Susan Latremoille, empower financial advisors to help their clients thrive in their post-career by having a clear lifestyle plan to complement their financial plan. To learn more, contact her at Marianne@NextChapterLifestyleAdvisors.com or visit NextChapterLifestyleAdvisors.com.
